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The Love of My Life
by Cesar, from El Sereno, California.

VergonesA few of years ago, I met this fine ass gangster guy in school. I was still kind of shy back then, and truthfully, since all the girls liked him and he seemed to love the attention, I thought it would be a waste of time for me to try anything. He had a shaved head, a ‘stache, a slim tight body and the most beautiful smile I had ever seen. Well, when I graduated from school, I thought that I would never see him again. Was I ever wrong!

A couple of years after high school, I was cleaning out my closet when I came across his number which I had written down on a piece of paper. At first I thought to myself, "Throw it away!" I mean, from what I had heard, he had moved to Arizona and was no longer in L.A. But after much thought, I was like, "Fuck it!!" I'll call and if he is in Arizona, at least I tried.

So I called and just as I was about to hang up, a female voice answered sweetly, “Hello!”

I nervously pushed the words out, “Hello, buenas tardes, se encuentra Lalo?” (Hello, good afternoon, is Lalo there?).

“Quien habla?” the female voice asked. (Who’s speaking?)

Man, what should I do? So I thought, FUCK IT!! I am going all the way here. “Mi nombre es Sesar. Soy un amigo de Lalo de la escuela. Yo fui a high school con Lalo.” (My name is Sesar, I’m a friend of Lalo from school. I went to high school with Lalo).

“Oh, ok...espera un momento,” the female voice said (Oh, okay, wait a moment).

MY GOD! I was about to talk to my high school fantasy man after so many years. SHIT! What am I going to say? Well, after what seemed forever, Lalo's familiar deep voice came on, “Hello!”

Damn, I had forgotten how his voice made me quiver all over. “Lalo?” I asked. “Yup, who is this?” he said.

“It's me Sesar from Wilson,” I explained.

“Oh, fuck! Wassup, bro?” he said.

SHIT!! He remembered me and seemed happy to hear from me.

“How've you been?” he asked.

“I've been cool. And you?” I asked.

“I'm aiight! So, que me dices?" he said. (I'm alright. So what's new?)

I answered, “Well, nothing I was just wondering what was up?"

He told me, “Nada! I've just been hanging.”

“Cool,” I said.

Well, after what seemed like forever, I remembered that a gay friend of mine had said he had met Lalo at a Halloween party. So, I mentioned it to him, “Hey, bro, I know someone you know!”

“Serious? Who?” he asked.

“Tony,” I said.

“Tony? What's his last name?” he asked.

After I told him Tony’s last name, Lalo said, “Oh, shit, you mean gay Tony? He tried getting with me and my brother at this party a year ago!”

SHIT! Tony was right so far.

“Really?" I said.

“Yup, but I told him I wasn't into three ways!” Lalo said. Now this intrigued me. I didn't know what to say to get more information, so I asked, “What do you think of Tony being gay?”

"It's cool, it don't matter!” Lalo said. I was like...ok!

Then he said something that caught me off guard. He said, “Actually, I thought I was gay when I was younger!”

OH SHIT! Had I heard what I thought I heard? I decided I wanted to find out. So, after a couple of minutes, I asked him if he wanted to hang out and go eat or something. This way, we could catch up on old times face to face. And also, this way I could get to see my LALO one more time. Well, it took him quite some time to answer, and then he was like, “Bro, hold up real quick!” I think his mom was calling him or something.

While he was away, I thought, "SHIT....What am I going to talk about? What if he says no?" What if he says yes?"

Just as I was about to hang up and run like a bitch, he came back on the phone and said, “Claro, cuando?” (Sure, when?)

I was like, “How about in 15 minutes?”

He was like, “Cool! You know where I stay at?”

To this I answered, “Are you still on Edna Street?”

Surprised that I knew, he was like, “Yeah!”

So, before he could say anything, I said, “Cool...then I'll honk.” “Cool, cool.....I'll be waiting!” he said and hung up the phone.

So, I rushed and jumped into jeans and a buttoned down collar shirt and some cologne of course (I wanted to smell nice) and jetted out the door. On my way there, I thought to myself, “What the fuck am I doing?”

When I got there, I pulled up and honked. As I waited for him to get to the car, I checked myself in the rear view mirror and tried to pep myself up.

Just as I looked out the driver's side of my car, I heard a knocking on my passenger side and it was him. FUCK! He was still fine! And his smile......Ay Ay Ay Ay! It made me feel the warm feelings it used to make me feel in high school. I reached over and opened the door, and as he got in, I tried to be all calm and shit! “How you been Sesar?” he asked.

“I've been cool...and you?” I asked. I couldn't believe I got those words out.

“I've been fine,” he answered. I thought to myself, “Yes you have! More ways than one.”

So, as we drove I asked him, “What do you want to eat?”

He was like, “I'm cool with whatevers.”

So, I thought to myself, “I want to have a long ass talk, so I am going to drive really far away...heheheh.”

So, I asked him, “How about Tommy's?”

He was like, “DAMN! I haven't had Tommy's in a long ass time. I'm down.” So, as I drove, I took the streets all the way to the Tommy's passing downtown L.A.

As we drove, our conversation started to die down so I thought to myself, “FUCK IT! I am going to ask him about why he thought he was gay.”

I said, “Bro, so…what's up with you thinking you were gay?”

As I looked over at him, he smiled and answered, “I don't know. I just did!”

I wanted more information, so I asked, “Did you ever do anything with guys?”

“Not really, just a wonder here and there!” he said.

“That's cool,” I said.

He kind of made it a point to change the subject after a while. Well, we arrived at Tommy’s, grabbed our food, and I asked him if he wanted to eat it there or kick it at Elysian Park. He was like, “I'm down for the park.”

So, we drove to the park. When we were at the park, we sat in my car and ate. Suddenly he was the one asking me hella questions. And then, he asked me a question I had no idea how to answer, “Bro, Sesar, why were you so interested in me thinking I was gay when I was younger?” FUCK! How was I going to answer this one?

Then he asked me, “And you? Have you ever done anything with guys?”

SHIT! He was asking me if I was gay.

“Nah, bro! I have never been with guys or girls for that matter,” I said.

To this he surprisingly said, “No shit! You are a virgin, bro?”

“Yup!” I said.

“Why?” He asked, looking at me. Just as I was thinking of something else to say, I said, “Well, I am gay and looking for a quality guy.”

He surprised me by saying, “Bro, you are a cute mother fucker, you should be out there screwing around.”

Even though this surprised me, I mean my high school fantasy guy telling me I was cute, I wanted him to know where I was coming from, so I told him, “Bro, I am not looking to screw everything that walks. I am looking for love and romance and all that!”

To which he responded, "Shit, Sesar, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to insult you. I actually think that's very cool of you to wait for all that.”

“Thanks for the compliment though,” I said.

Everything went quiet at this point and I was like.....SHIT...FUCK IT!

“Lalo, I am going to tell you something, and I know this is going to be strange.....but FUCK IT!"

“Wassup, bro?” He asked, looking at me.

“You know back in high school, I would always be around you?” I said.

“Well, I never thought about it,” he said.

“Well, Lalo, I am gay! And I have a thing for you!" SHIT!!

Before I could think about what I had just said, he looked over at me and said, “You know what, bro? I kind of felt you did. I mean, you called me after so long and even back then, when I got hurt and was in the hospital, you went to go see me. You were always so cool to me.”

SHIT, now I was speechless!

“Bro, you know what, I think that's cool! Maybe things could work out between us? You wanna try?” he asked me.

FUCK! Here was my fantasy man asking if I wanted to try to be together. I was speechless, and just as I turned to look at him and see if he was being serious, he kissed me! And not just any kind of kiss, he passionately kissed me. And as he kissed me, he held me so tight. Man, I melted. I had never kissed anyone, and this was heaven. SHIT! I wanted this moment to last forever.

Slowly, he moved his lips around mine, and then his tongue invaded my mouth. Fuck, this was weird, but I went along and tried to learn as I went. I could feel his tongue against mine. Caressing my tongue gently. His right hand caressing the back of my neck. Just as I was getting into it, he moved slowly away and asked me, “Sesar, you want to go further?”

I was like, “I don't know.”

He said, “Baby, I'm not going to play you. I want us to be together.”

At first I was like, “Shit , this is not me.”

But then I was like, “SURE.”

So, he looked at me and said, “Just to show you I am serious about wanting to be with you, I am going to do something I have never done before.”

With a confused face, I was like, “What do you mean?”

To which he responded, “Let me pleasure you!”

I was like, “You don't have to!”

He looked at me, smiled and said, “Sesar, you have always been so nice and cool with me. Bro, without me even knowing it, I fell for you! That's why when you called, I was all happy. Because I thought I would never get to talk to you again. And now that I know how you feel about me, I am not going to lose you or fuck things up. Shit,” he continued, “why do you think I have been so quiet tonight? You make me all nervous, something no one has ever done. And you know what?” he continued, “I like the feeling of knowing that it's you who is doing this to me. So please, let me show you I am serious about wanting to be with you! Let me give you happiness as you have emotionally given me.”

Before I could say anything, he put his hand on my dick and through my baggie jeans started to massage. He then kissed me and continued his massaging. He started to kiss me on my neck and nibbled on my ear and before I knew it, I had a raging hard on that not even I could control. As he continued to massage, he kissed my neck and unbuttoned my shirt with his free hand. He put his free hand in my shirt and ran his hand all over my chest. MAN, here I was in my car getting pleasured by my fantasy man.

He then lifted my shirt and stuck his head under my shirt and started to kiss my chest. FUCK. I was moaning from all the pleasure which was going through my body. Then, slowly he moved his tongue all around my chest and before I knew it, he started to suck and gently bite on my nipples. Fuck, this fool knew what he was doing. How many girls before me had he done this same thing to? And now, here I was about to shoot my load.

Just as he did this, I could no longer control myself, and I told him I was about to shoot. To which he responded, “Wait, I want to blow you!”

So, before I could say yes or no, he started to unbutton my baggies, stuck his hands on my waist band and pulled down my boxers. Just as he did this, my dick popped up and hit me on my stomach. He then kissed me and then went for my joystick. He kissed the tip, blew on it gently, and then he allowed the tip of my dick between his lips and started to roll his tongue around it. Just as I though I was going to shoot, he went down even further, and before I knew it he had me completely in his mouth.

Slowly he moved up and down, up and down. I gently put my hand on his head and gently rubbed. Man, I was in heaven. Just then, I started to feel the warning tightness in my balls I feel when I am about to cum. So I moaned and I told him, “I am about to cum!”

I tried to pull away, but he kept me in his mouth. I then shot load after load into his warm mouth and fell into a weakness. He slowly took everything in and then licked what was left on my dick. Then he came up face to face, looked at me, smiled and kissed me passionately once again as in the beginning. He then pulled away and with complete love in his words, he said, “Now we are connected, just as I was hoping!”

Well, I pulled my pants back up and asked him if he wanted to leave. To which he said, “Nah, let's just kick it here. I want to be with you!”

To which I smiled and just sat there. Well, we talked and talked and before we knew it, we saw the little clock in my car, and it said it was 4:47am. SHIT! We had been here for almost 10 hours. It didn't feel that long...he agreed. Well, we both unwantingly decided it was time to head back to our little city, so we did. As I drove back through Elysian Park about to pass The Police Academy, he reached over, grabbed my right hand, brought it to his lips, kissed it and held it in his lap all the way home.

When we reached his pad, we sat there, neither one wanting to say good bye, just looking at each other. Finally, I said, “Bro, you better get inside, I don't want you getting sick!”

To which he responded, “If I do get sick, will you bring me Chicken Noodle Soup?”

To which I responded, “Of course, I'll even feed it to you!”

He smiled, kissed me and said, “I can truthfully and honestly say, I already know I love you and I always will!”

I looked at him and said, “I love you Lalo, and I will always. I can already feel it!”

I sat there as he walked up his driveway and up to his door. He opened his door, turned around and he crossed both of his arms in front of his chest and then he crossed his fingers and looked at me and then he pointed at me. He later told me this meant he loved and wanted us to be forever connected. I drove home and happily went to bed.

Needless to say that was one year ago, and to this day, we are still very much in love and occasionally revisit our spot at Elysian Park. I sometimes look at him as he sleeps and say to myself, “You lucky bastard, after so many years from graduating high school, who would have ever thought that you would be laying next to the man you loved in high school and that he would feel the same way for you?”

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